It is 2.47AM and I feel like so many things on my mind to tell but it is like , should I say a thick barrier, rough and tough , approx and etc.
The first thing that messing up my mind should be the first thing that I'll write here. First thing first, STUDIES.. I planned and I wanted to study a bit maybe like peeking a boo the Budgeting topic for my G-Buzz preparation. I dunno how much it helps but more or less it will. It is just that I am not in the mood. I dunno if to some people, some things happen in their life will not distract their studies and I am confused with
mine.
As far as I'm concerned when I was in form 4 I felt depressed the most and I cried too much. I got the SBP offer letter which is Sekolah Tuanku Ja'afar, I was glad because it was a SBP offer letter yet I was a bit upset because I was expecting for TKC or STF. I asked my parents to change the school but they said its good for me as in it is nearer. Hurm life is like that, a good fortune whether u take it or leave it. Chance comes once in a lifetime. I had a hard time there, my first time staying at boarding school and it was kinda different from my daily school life. Totally different better put it that way. I cried everyday even though I sneaked out of the hostel every weekend and went home just because I wanted to have lunch and sleep at my bed sweet bedroom..But still I had a great time actually there. Great friends but horrifying gossips...Wink. I also scored my SPM there..=P
Hurmmm....So relaxing...I am listening to Jazz online radio and Alicia Keys songs on air. It is " How Come You Don't Call Me?".. Wow it's like punching my heart right now.
What else about my 2007 year, the year I mentioned that could empty my tears tank. My first time to try to fall in love and luckily he came into my life. In the first place I was wondering if he's the one for me? Am I going to spend the rest of my life with him? I was just too young to have that that that super serious matured relationship. So I told myself just try with him, go out have fun like other teenage couples do nowadays. Give him the chance and,,,,,,have fun.

In the second place, it was hard for me to accept that my heart were taken by him. Slowly I trained myself to like him and eventually he won the game. I shouldn't bring up this point of my life. But I should to prove that I am not frigid. Speaking of a broken heart as if you notice my previous post
, yeah I admit that. Its not that he hurt me, but he made me realize that I am not an easy girl even though there are just certain guys in my life that I can close to, that I can feel happy with and that can make me feel comfortable around. He made me cry, he made my heart beating so fast every time I saw him, he made me fallen for him and the best thing, he made my head spinning round every time he called my name "Idora" and say "ILU" . YET...!!!! He failed to be the guy that I can close to, he failed to make me feel happy and he failed to make me feel comfortable around every time with him. And finally, he gave up on me..I dunno the "the end" of this love story, who hurts who?He's my First Love but He's not My True Love. I still respect him since he was the one who made me know what love is.
But don't worry. I am writing this as if I am the author of my own novel, I'll publish myself, I'll read, I'll conclude. I don't need others to do that.
Dear readers, it sounds rude to say that so I want you to know that i
t is my pleasure for you to read and conclude but just keep it yourself because I don't want this love life of mine be the "conversation fruit" among you.
I am happier now and I brag that I am getting more matured. Believe it or not? This 9th Mar I'll turn 19 and 1 year left there's no more teens and same thing goes to all my peers. Wink. Owh back to my point, to certain people in my life, I am sorry if I make you wait, if ever I offended you with what I said but I believe in myself because I never declare any promises, any agreement. What a relief..As a going to 19 years old girl, I prefer to just focus on studies right peers? What I want you to know that I don't want to blow it away easily. The happiness that I have now. What a comfy space in my heart. As long as we happy so just go with the flow and I bet that is better than anything that might create troubles. For once and for all.
2007 was a nightmare,, 2008 was a history, 2009 was "A" Wake-up-call
and

2010 is my new journey as in I'll be starting my first semester.